On managing clumsiness

It's like cups leap off the tables all by themselves...

Photo by Eastman Childs on Unsplash

I was once told that I was one of the clumsiest people they knew. I’m the clumsiest person that I know too, so I didn’t take it as an insult.

This clumsiness is a proprioception issue, i.e. one’s sense of knowing the location, movement and action of one’s body. Since being aware of this limitation, I’ve found a few coping strategies and I hope they’re helpful for you too:

• Spilling. I have destroyed more than one work laptop because I kept spilling cups of tea (and in one case, a glass of champagne) on them. Eventually I realised it was because I move my dominant hand about a lot. So I got into the habit of putting my drinks on the other side of the laptop, forcing me to pick them up with my non-dominant hand. I did this at dinner, in the pub or whenever I was at a table. The spillages (on the tabletop, at least) have nearly all but disappeared.

• Burning. I have at least 10 burn scars on my hands and wrists from catching them on oven shelves whilst checking on food. The root cause was me grabbing tea towels on the oven handle, because they were within easy reach - and their protection is somewhat limited. So I bought oven gloves, put them on the oven handle, and moved the towels so that I could only easily access the oven gloves. My wrists have been more or less fine since.

• Bumping. My legs love a good table to walk into. It’s because I am so focused on whatever I’m doing, from exiting a room to looking at my phone, that I misjudge the size and shape of the obstacle. I’ve realised that I can’t ‘just’ look where I’m going. I have to ensure there are no obstacles in the first place. That means moving tables up against walls to removing anything hanging on the ends of bannisters. My place might look a bit odd, but I no longer have bruises!

• Dropping. If I try to carry more things than I have hands, somehow at least one item leaps out. If I’m taking things up/downstairs, I use the ‘step’ method where I take up one or two things and leave the rest on the steps for the next time I’m going in that direction. For most other carrying activities, like shopping from the car, I have to stick to carrying no more items than I have hands. It’s far better to take a few extra seconds to do more trips than drop things and break them.

I’m sure there are a ton more ways to manage proprioception issues, but the key is to not beat yourself up for ‘being clumsy’. It’s ableist and helps no-one. Proprioception is a neurological difference and so requires conscious efforts to work with your brain, rather than against it.